feeling a little down

Hey party people,

So this week is going kinda bleh.  I taught four periods of third years yesterday and one period of second years today.  Yesterday, for all four classes, all these kids would just not shut up.  Like, every time either I or the other teacher spoke trying to give instructions or just transition to the next activity, the volume of the room would just increase so that no one could hear anyone clearly.  It was really annoying.  And I don't like to yell.  I wait.  The third years' classes usually proceed this way with the other teachers yelling for everyone to be quiet and me just quietly waiting bored at the front of the room wondering if we'll get to finish everything on the lesson for the agenda.

Anyways, this time I got really mad because they were being really rude, and I yelled a little.
 I raised my voice to say, "Aren't you third years?!  Aren't you the oldest students at this school?  And you can't even be quiet long enough for us to do this lesson?  You're third years!"  And then the Japanese teacher of English (JTE) translated for me, and the kids finally calmed down a bit.  Ooof.  I felt so upset and shaky.  I hate that I had to do that to get their attention and get them to cooperate so we could finish the lesson.  Ugh, and it kinda set the mood for the rest of the day.  Every class was loud, but instead of yelling, I waited quietly as usual, so, of course, we didn't get to do everything on the agenda, but, oh well.  Although when I got a break to talk to the JTE, I told her that maybe we should both wait instead of yelling and see how it goes.  Oh my god, it really worked.  Even though we had to do it like five times, they eventually caught on and let us finish the lesson.  Aaaand one student, who was talking the entire time I was explaining a super easy set of instructions for an activity, made me get sassy.  He was all like, I don't get it.  I need the instructions translated in Japanese.  Japanese, please!  (In Japanese) And I just looked at him and in English was like, "Well, if you listened, please, then you would understand."  I put my hand to my ear and gave him a pretty sassy face and tone.  The entire class ooo-ed, and the JTE even backed me up and was like, yeah, if you just listened the first time, you would get it.  It's easy!  Heh heh heh....

It seriously was an easy activity.  I had the worksheet drawn on the board and all they had to do was listen and circle what word they heard from the selection of words in a pyramid.

And today, the second years were pretty dead when we started class and did our routine greetings really halfheartedly and then talked the entire time the JTE and I were talking and trying to teach and give instructions.  Then when they had to start writing a SIX SENTENCE essay on their dreams and were told they would do short interviews with me in the meantime, they broke out into muri! (impossible!) dekihen! (I can't) and all manners of basically, I don't want to do the assignments.  Now, don't get me wrong.  It wasn't like a yelling fest or anything, just a general mumbling.  However, it was enough to be the last straw for the JTE, and he told everyone to stop and listen and then proceeded to scold everyone for 15 minutes in a deep, grumbling, r-trilling voice littered with so much Kansai dialect.  Every kid shut up so fast and couldn't even look him in the face.  I have to pretend to not know Japanese in English class, but wow, he was tearing them apart saying things like why do you even come to school if you're not gonna participate and learn and how could they be so rude to me the assistant who just wants to help them learn and that he will not tolerate such behavior and lack of effort and energy because otherwise what's the point of class and they need to remember why they are in school etc. etc. etc.  Then when he got done, he apologized to me and said I could go because this class was not happening and that he was just gonna reprimand them for the rest of class for being so rude.

Damn, it's been a rough two days.  I'm so ready for the weekend already, lol.

BUT!  It hasn't all been bad.  Classes have kinda sucked, but since when is there a class that doesn't have off days?  or a person for that matter (seeing as I let it get to me yesterday)?

And the kids I see in the hall have been super nice greeting me and talking to me with what little English they have when we get a minute.  And many students have been handing in their paper gingerbread cookies of which some have been really nice and creative or hilarious.  My co-workers have been really supportive of me and my role and my decisions in the classroom, and I get to work in the only heated rooms of the school building, the staff room and my classroom.  One of my co-workers even warned me about there being apple bread in today's lunch remembering that I have an apple allergy.  Such good looking out.  I appreciate it.  And then another teacher with whom I have been becoming better friends with traded bread with me so that I could have bread for lunch.  So yeah, classes may have sucked so far this week, but there are tons of other good things that outweigh a few sucky classes.